December 2010
1 post
2 tags
Sushi Boat
island girl: “your mustache tastes like fish.”
me: “that’s kind of gross…sorry.”
island girl: “it’s like you gave cunnilingus to a mermaid.”
October 2010
1 post
ostentatious jackass
island gurl: wanna see jackass 3D tonight bro?after dinner?
me: ummmmm
island gurl: …………….
me: sure
island gurl: fine asshole im sorry its not all refined and sophisitcated FRENCH FILM so here’s some FRENCH FOR YOU FUCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK YOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUU
PENIS
LETS JUST STAY HOME AND WATCH SOME GODDARD FILMS AND SIP ESPRESSO AND EAT SARDINES...
September 2009
32 posts
“Fat girls are tighter.”
– Context: Island gurl sharing some of her philosophical musings on life.
“me: i think my sisters want to celebrate our birthdays tomorrow
because...”
– context: birthdays are the best time of the year
“Your beard covers up your ugly face. You should grow it so it covers the entire...”
– Context: My beard is a metaphorical paper bag?
“Am I your beard? Beard=cover to society that you are not gay?”
– Context: Beards and Sexuality, interrelated?
“Island Gurl: “Why do you have brown fever as your status?”
me: I...”
– Context: Someone logged into my gmail and changed my status
“Happy Native American celebration day!”
– Context: Native Americans need their own month too.
“Merry Xmas! Hope you celebrate the fake birth of Jesus by shoving a crucifix in...”
– Context: Seasons Greetings!
“Are you dropping the big brown bomb on porcelain city? Guys probably think you...”
– Context: Trying to lighten the load ;)
“Skeet skeet on no internet and cable. I am going to Ian Curtis it.”
– Context: Fat slutty roommate had no $$$ to pay the cable bill.
“Pig-dog is being a nig**r/real brat. I beat him with the broom real good.”
– Context: Pug abuse
“Skeet skeet on your dollar saver!”
– Context: Me trying to save some $$$
“Skeet skeet on this relationship, it’s over!”
“Skeet skeet on your meatball sandwich, you tomato eating bastard!!”
– Context: $5 meatball sandwich from Subway.
“Skeet skeet on you hanging up on me! You are the white devil.”
– Context: The signal dropped out.
“Let’s study at the beach today my favorite bro.”
– Context: Island girls have a hard time staying away from the beach.
“Pooping on campus is hard. How do you do it? Yea this message is super...”
– Context: Butthole pleasures.
“I am going to invent coffee with a dash of coke in it and sell it to the...”
– Context: Innovative ideas?
“Skeet skeet on your headphones. Do they block out the sound of fat gurl’s...”
– Context: Fat slutty roommate who likes to bang guys she meets on internet dating sites.
“Skeet Skeet on your dong wanting ways.”
– Context: Apparently I wanted some dong?
“What if I ran my entire business from my phone? Should you skeet skeet on me?”
– Context: That Tom’s bro that runs his entire business from his PHONE.
“fggt:alt bro
Bigot: Zjean Michael
Skeet Skeet: Guido delight”
– Context: Studying analogies for the GRE, pick the best answer bro.
“I will just eat my mucus then, asshole white man who takes everything!”
– Context: I ate all her pina colada yogurt.
“Was the cbest a test that you take to prove you are not retarded?”
– Context: I took the CBEST.
“I just heard you fart! It echoed against the chair! good job”
– Context: I farted.
“Gotta be ready to chase down all da bro h8ers. If only you could cure da h8...”
– Context: Why do bro’s wear running shoes all of the time?
“Skeet skeet on your muthafuckin face niggah”
– Context: I miss you?
“Hello babe! Hope you are having a fab day even though prop 8 passed!”
– Context: A reocurring quotidian theme
“Will you be mad if I cooked and ate pig-dog?”
– Context: Hungry Filipina Island Girl
“Skeet skeet on your face. I am only dating you to improve my minority social...”
– Context: Brown people are lazy.
“You are a racist asshole. I am sorry my skin is not pale and my hair is not...”
– Context: I took the leftover beef for lunch without asking.
“I’m going to move to San Francisco and get a new cool boyfriend. You can...”
“You had an awful time in Sweden because you still liked your cunt of an...”