me: i think my sisters want to celebrate our birthdays tomorrow
because t*&% is leaving
island gurl: omg they don’t have to celebrate my birthday
me: they were going to bake you a mango cheesecake though.
island gurl: i was going to stick an italian sausage next to 2 meatballs on a bed of pasta and put a candle on top for you then asshole guido
island gurl: GARLIC MUNCHER BASIL PICKER EAT PASTA YOU PRICK
— context: birthdays are the best time of the year
